I fear committing zina. I had a love and I was heartbroken because I did not even talk to him to avoid zina, but I ended up committing it. I was mentally ill at that time and I am a female so it is presumably forgiven. Soon after committing, I did Tawana but now men harass me as I am of a maturer age now and I fear I will commit it again too. It is said that tawbah is accepted only once and I am religious so I don't want to be deprived of Paradise. Second I have also read that Allah does not forgive until repentance is done in front of everyone. How should I do tawbah? I want Paradise badly.